Frith and the Ways of Healing
I’ve been on something of a life-long journey seeking peace. For as long as I can remember, the cultivation and attainment of various kinds of peace have been pretty much central to my personal healing journey. Navigating Tourette Syndrome and sometimes severe anxiety have always reminded me that the ability to just be in stillness, quiet, and calm is sometimes the greatest of all gifts. I think that general peace is something you don’t miss until it’s gone- when you cannot get that moment of quiet, that sense that all is well, that depth of kinship, or the stillness and relaxation in body you really become aware of what a lack of peace means and why this thing so many of us try to cultivate is so important.
For me, the seeking of peace has come in many forms: meditation, mindfulness, therapy, time in nature, self-reflection, and spiritual practices. It wasn’t until I started using some of our ancestral perspectives of frið (frith) that things really began to unfold. What I’d like to share with you here, in something of a more personal post, is ways that I’ve taken inspiration from the sanctity and importance of frith to my ancestors and applied it in relevant and modern ways to my own healing and to that of my clients.
Let me begin by saying something that is crucial to wellness on all levels: stress is a primary factor in all disease. Stress levels in the body dramatically influence how well the body can heal itself, stay resilient in the face of diseases, prevent acute issues from turning into chronic ones, and prevent disease patterns from happening in the first place. In other words, if we live in chronic stress, we’re in the least powerful place to be healthy. Healing and health happen in the rest and digest part of our autonomic nervous response where we nourish, heal, recover, and repair. It does not happen in the fight, flight, freeze part where we’re too busy trying to stay alive and run from perceived danger than we are healing. This realization is often all the ‘a-ha!’ one needs to start taking stress seriously.
As mentioned earlier, I want to break down the societal importance of frið in Anglo-Saxon Pagan culture and apply it to personal wellness, with much creative license and experience being added in. We’ll break down some core aspects of frith and see how they act as important socio-cultural roots and then how they connect to personal healing and wellness.
PEACE
We of course begin with peace. The peace of frið is not what we usually think of ‘peace’ which we often conflate with calm, relaxed, and tranquil. Rather, the peace of ancient frith is one of inviolable security, safety, belonging, and protection.
When we are in a societal state of frith, we feel and experiene belonging to our kin, having them at our back through thick and thin, never being alone as we face life, and knowing that even when we screw up, they’ll be there for us. This kind of love allows one to deeply rest in the knowing that all will be well.
Internally, frith is more complicated because one of the most epidemic diseases of our time is a lack of love of self. In order for frith to exist within the self and between all the souls, we have to feel and experience that we always have our own back, that we’re always watching out for ourself, and that we will always accept, forgive, and embrace. Many of us navigate life with a whole lot of shame, guilt, and ‘should’… this is not frith. Rather, these feelings create a sense of combative hostility within the being that separates us from our power and disconnects us from being a whole person in unity. Lack pf peace causes stress, stress causes the breathing to become quick and shallow, and the breath-soul which unites all aspects of self loses coherence.
Roll your eyes all you like, self-love and being there for yourself is the greatest of all medicines for stress. You are the only thinker in your head and your words and deeds are the only things you have true control over in the world.
SOCIAL BONDS
In society, frið focuses on our relationships- who we connect to and consider kin, how we connect to them, how the sacred gifting cycles are enacted, and how we uplift one another. If our social relationships are bad, then we cannot sleep peacefully.
Internally, these bonds are reflected in the ways in which we think, speak, and behave. Just like our social relationships demand due respect and abiding by social customs and established laws, the inner expressions do as well. To be in frith we simply cannot think, say, and do whatever we want to ourselves. Peace is not cultivated by negative self talk, berating one’s self in spoken word, or taking actions that don’t nourish, protect, and care for the whole person. If our inner dialogue is one of shame and negativity, we tear ourselves up jokingly with our words, and our behaviors are not healthy or aligned to self, then we cannot be in internal frith.
SANCTUARY
In ancient times, frith ensured that there were sacred spaces where folks could seek asylum and be protected from other people, groups, and even from certain rules and regulations. These spaces could be associated with temples, sacred grounds, gathering sites, or areas where anything but peace could offend the spirits of place.
Internally, frið requires that we see and experience our bodies as sacred, autonomous, and sovereign spaces where we can fully settle into self and feel safe. Sanctuary on a personal level affirms boundaries and marks the body as a space where we are safe.
LOYALTY
In society, the maintenance of frith requires that one be loyal to their leaders, rulers, and protectors. Without this loyalty, there is no peace within the group and those who need to be trusted to do whatever it is they do will not have the trust they need- things will fall apart quickly as we see in modern politics when the people don’t trust those in positions of leadership and power.
On a personal level, I think this aspect of loyalty translates to piety. Peace doesn’t happen in a vacuum- like all things, it is embedded in the web of life and in kinship. Loyalty and devotion to our ancestors, deities, and spirits of place is essential to feeling part of the world, connected to nature, and aligned to a group larger than ourselves- the very definition of frið.
“for a good year and peace”, an Old Norse ritual charm
Here we come to the deep medicine of frith…
We must intentionally cultivate peace within in order to fully participate in it around us; a self without peace cannot participate in a collective at peace.
We must treat ourselves as we treat our dearest kin- our bodies and all our souls are worthy of love, protection, and nourishment.
Hostile thoughts, words, and deeds against the self are acts of war rather than peace; we must think, speak, and act in ways that nourish our peace.
The whole being is a sacred space imbued with the blessings of ancestors, gods, and spirits- and it must be treated as such.
Without kinship and sacred reciprocity with our allies of many worlds, we will never feel as though we truly belong here and are part of the world.
There are a few simple ways to start exploring the cultivation of frið in wortcunning practices and in self-affirming practices as well…
When you find yourself thinking or saying unhealthy things about yourself, stop, breathe, forgive, and restate in the positive- yes, positive affirmations! I sincerely believe that early non-materialistic teachers of affirmation work were tapping into the same wisdom and power that connects to galdor.
When taking herbal remedies, affirm that you are worthy of health, deserving of love, and grateful for your kinship with the plants. Elevate the kind of thinking and feeling you have and your whole being will respond.
Take actions each day that are radical acts of nourishment for your body. Do things for you that you’d do for those you love.
See your ancestors within you, experience your gods surrounding you, and explore the spirits that nourish you.
Bring aspects of galdor into your everyday: say positive, present, and empowered things out loud for you to hear- the charms are always written as fact which gives the being something to hold into to. Again, positive affirmations can be done in a way that honors our Galdor practices while allowing modern science to empower the work at hand.
